"All the single ladies, All the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies now put your hands up!"
*Amber raises hand*
Before I go any further, let me say that the following blog is going to be very honest. I am pouring out the feelings and thoughts that have been in my heart and mind for several months. Whether you agree or disagree with any of the following things is completely up to you. If this helps anybody, then wonderful! If it turns out to be a complete waste of your time, then I apologize. For me, this post is nothing more than a public therapy session. (Completely free, I might add cause I am a broke college student!) So here it goes. You have been warned.
I have been single for almost 21 years. Only in the past two years has it really started to have an effect on me. But can you really blame me? When I go out to festivals or the movies or even the grocery store and see these kids, barely in high school or junior high, holding hands and being a couple, it makes me somewhat frustrated. They can get a date and I can't? When I know the people I am around on a daily basis are being intimate with someone else, I won't lie and say that I don't get a little envious because I do. The absolute worst is when I take the plunge and confess my feelings to that person, and they are not returned. Literally, that is the story of the "romantic" portion of my life. One would think that all these risks that I have taken would eventually work out, but alas, they have not.
"God will bring the perfect one for you in His timing."
"You are a very independent person, and most guys can't or don't know how to handle that. Eventually the one who can will come along."
"Maybe if you lowered your standards, you could find one."
The above are all phrases I have heard countless times from multiple people. The first two I believe 100%. The last is something I laugh at. I appreciate the honest and sincerity that is behind those statements, but still hearing them over and over again, I think I've become numb to them.
So for the past two years I've struggled with wondering what was wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? Why not me? Maybe I am not smart enough. I am most definitely not pretty enough. Perhaps, I am annoying, and I am one of those people that is destined to be single for the rest of her life. I suppose I should go ahead and get a jump start on being a dog lady. I guess they can just go right ahead and put spinster on my headstone. I have thought all those things......
............
................................
............
How many times did I use the word, "I" or "me" in the paragraph just before? A dozen flippin times!! It was this morning through a wonderful message preached by Pastor Warren Johnson at Grace Baptist Church that God suddenly opened my eyes to the harsh truth: my attitude sucks! I have been wanting a relationship for the purpose of satisfying my fleshly emotions and desires. Yes, of course, I wanted God to be a part of it, but I was giving Him a part that was quite minimal! That is such a selfish and shallow view to have of relationships. Beautiful relationships that are worth more than the finest jewels are relationships that have a purpose of furthering the kingdom of God. If I am only wanting to be with someone for the physical, I am going to be sorely disappointed when the relationship doesn't work out exactly how I planned or wanted.
I have decided to stop worrying about my solitude, because the reality is I am not alone! I serve and follow a God whose love is deeper than the deepest ocean, higher than the tallest mountain, and wider than the widest valley!! If I truly want the best relationship and marriage possible, I don't need to be chasing after every cute guy that walks into church or past me in the halls. I need to be chasing God and counting on Him to bring me someone who will make me chase after spiritual things even faster and harder!!
So to all my friends that had to listen to me vent and whine and complain, I FINALLY figured it out!! Thank you for sticking with me.
To the young girls and guys reading this, learn this valuable lesson as soon as possible. It will save you so much heart ache and emotions that could be better spent on something else. It will also save you a ton of time!! Time that I promise will be better spent building a stronger relationship with God. Please don't start dating a guy just because you feel lonely, or because you want to get away from your family situation, or you want to be intimate. Date a guy because he inspires you to be a better Christian. Date him because you feel the Lord's peace when you're with him; and above all, put God first in the relationship. Do this and be amazed at the blessings God gives you!!
If you made it this far, thanks! Don't judge my feelings and wrong behavior too harshly.
Oh, and I promise to begin writing on a regular basis.
Until next time,
Ammer Hammer
"All the single ladies, all the single ladies. All the single ladies, all the single ladies, put your hands up!"
*Amber leaves her hands down and dances like a goofball*
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
How May I Pray For You??
Hello All!
I wanted to share with y'all a very awesome experience that happened at work this past Monday.
Four girls around my age walked into Applebees and sat in my section. They were polite, cheerful, and eager to carry on a conversation with me. When I brought their food out, one of the girls said to me "We're going to pray for this food. Is there anything we can pray about for you?" I was so taken aback it took me a few seconds to think of something. I asked them to pray for my upcoming school semester, and then I asked if I could pray with them. They agreed enthusiastically, and there, in booth 52, at Applebees in Little Elm, TX, five girls had joined hands and were praying for each other and thanking God for the blessings He has bestowed.
From my point of view as a server, knowing that someone took time out of their evening to ask if there was anything I needed prayer for was sweet and proved that there are still people out there who genuinely care for others. Now, from my point of view as a Christian, my heart was overflowing! It made my heart happy to know that there are young Christians out there who are not afraid to let people know what and who they believe in by praying in public and for a complete stranger. I have to admit though, mixed with my feelings of joy, I also felt the Holy Spirit convicting me. I have been a server for almost three years, and something like what happened to me Monday has only happened one or two other times before. Why is that?? It would be fair, and I would accept someone telling me that they have never thought about asking their server if they needed prayer for anything because, I myself, have never thought of it. However, it is not an excuse anymore. Those girls challenged me to begin doing that. They challenged me to begin doing what I should have been doing all along.
James 5:16 - "Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."
1 Thessalonians 5:17 - "Pray without ceasing."
1 Timothy 2:8 -"I will therefore that men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting."
Now I challenge all of you! You've heard of the Drive Thru Difference, right? Ya know, paying for the person behind you in the drive thru line? That movement/challenge is being done everyday across the country! I want to make this a movement!! When you go out to eat, be sure to get the name of your server. (Trust me, hearing "Miss" or "Waitress" gets old after a while, and we don't often answer to it because there are several other misses and waitresses around) When your food is brought out and before you begin chowing down, let them know you are going to pray for the food and would like to know if there is anything they would like you to pray for! Believe me, they will be stunned silent for a while, but encourage them by saying something like, "It can be anything! Big or small!" Let them know you're serious about it. Be sure to also leave a tract or business card with your church's info on it. Lastly, and kind of unrelated but not really, leave an appropriate tip. Don't think that because you prayed for them it should be less of a tip. You don't know how many times I hear that the "church crowds" don't tip. That is a stereotype on Christians that should not be there! Now, if the server doesn't do his/her job properly take that into consideration, but don't, under any circumstances, stiff them. Servers will be more likely to read the tract or perhaps even visit your church if you were nice and rewarded their service.
So how about it?? Are you willing to help me make this out of the ordinary act become something common and extraordinary?!?! Let's show people that Christians do care, one dining experience at a time!!!
Until next time,
Ammer Hammer
I wanted to share with y'all a very awesome experience that happened at work this past Monday.
Four girls around my age walked into Applebees and sat in my section. They were polite, cheerful, and eager to carry on a conversation with me. When I brought their food out, one of the girls said to me "We're going to pray for this food. Is there anything we can pray about for you?" I was so taken aback it took me a few seconds to think of something. I asked them to pray for my upcoming school semester, and then I asked if I could pray with them. They agreed enthusiastically, and there, in booth 52, at Applebees in Little Elm, TX, five girls had joined hands and were praying for each other and thanking God for the blessings He has bestowed.
From my point of view as a server, knowing that someone took time out of their evening to ask if there was anything I needed prayer for was sweet and proved that there are still people out there who genuinely care for others. Now, from my point of view as a Christian, my heart was overflowing! It made my heart happy to know that there are young Christians out there who are not afraid to let people know what and who they believe in by praying in public and for a complete stranger. I have to admit though, mixed with my feelings of joy, I also felt the Holy Spirit convicting me. I have been a server for almost three years, and something like what happened to me Monday has only happened one or two other times before. Why is that?? It would be fair, and I would accept someone telling me that they have never thought about asking their server if they needed prayer for anything because, I myself, have never thought of it. However, it is not an excuse anymore. Those girls challenged me to begin doing that. They challenged me to begin doing what I should have been doing all along.
James 5:16 - "Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."
1 Thessalonians 5:17 - "Pray without ceasing."
1 Timothy 2:8 -"I will therefore that men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting."
Now I challenge all of you! You've heard of the Drive Thru Difference, right? Ya know, paying for the person behind you in the drive thru line? That movement/challenge is being done everyday across the country! I want to make this a movement!! When you go out to eat, be sure to get the name of your server. (Trust me, hearing "Miss" or "Waitress" gets old after a while, and we don't often answer to it because there are several other misses and waitresses around) When your food is brought out and before you begin chowing down, let them know you are going to pray for the food and would like to know if there is anything they would like you to pray for! Believe me, they will be stunned silent for a while, but encourage them by saying something like, "It can be anything! Big or small!" Let them know you're serious about it. Be sure to also leave a tract or business card with your church's info on it. Lastly, and kind of unrelated but not really, leave an appropriate tip. Don't think that because you prayed for them it should be less of a tip. You don't know how many times I hear that the "church crowds" don't tip. That is a stereotype on Christians that should not be there! Now, if the server doesn't do his/her job properly take that into consideration, but don't, under any circumstances, stiff them. Servers will be more likely to read the tract or perhaps even visit your church if you were nice and rewarded their service.
So how about it?? Are you willing to help me make this out of the ordinary act become something common and extraordinary?!?! Let's show people that Christians do care, one dining experience at a time!!!
Until next time,
Ammer Hammer
Monday, May 13, 2013
Turn that frown upside down! (:
"So I'll learn to love these days
Life along the way
In the middle of the crazy
God Your love is so amazing
Through the ups and downs
You're the only hope I found, oh
Lord You meet me in the madness
So I'll learn to love these days
I'll learn to love these days"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tezG4LRNzw <- watch="">
"It takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile" We've all heard it at least once in our lives, but it got me thinking. If it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile, I bet it takes a heck of a lot more energy and breath to complain and be negative than it does to be encouraging and positive. I was talking to a close friend of mine the other day. I know she is the closest friend I have because she told me that some of my posts on my Facebook were whiny and dramatic. (Who really has the guts to say that but a close friend??) Well, she was absolutely right! I have no problem admitting that it is true. It was her statement that sparked the idea for this blog. It was also her comment and the above song that stirred the Holy Spirit's conviction.
The Bible warns several times about the sin of complaining:
Philippians 2:14, "Do all things without murmurings and disputings."
Ephesians 4:29, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."
Numbers 11:1, "And [when] the people complained, it displeased the LORD: and the LORD heard [it]; and his anger was kindled;"
And honestly, how many of us have gotten so put out with the Israelites while reading Exodus?? They grumbled so much, it is annoying!..... but then how annoying is it for other people to hear us complain, when the reality of the situation is we have AC and chocolate!! More importantly, how displeasing and annoying is it to the Lord who chooses to wake us up every morning? How angry does it make Him when He has blessed us more than we could have ever thought possible, but we only choose to acknowledge the negative or pain in our lives??
I opened this blog with the chorus from the song, "These Days" by Mandisa. (Definitely check this girl out!!) If you watched the video (you should have!! If not, go. NOW!) the first verse talks about everyday things that have a tendency to put us in a bad mood (not being able to find our phone, traffic, sit ups etc.); but then she says, "Funny what you use to help me grow." When I first heard that line, I stopped. Never in my life had I considered those things to be sent from God to be growing experiences, but that is exactly what they are!
In closing, a song combined with the blunt honesty from a friend were things I needed. I think y'all have figured out by now that not complaining is definitely something I intend to work on!! I didn't write this to guilt trip people (but if you do feel guilty, that would be the Holy Spirit's doing). I wrote this because I know I am not perfect, and I will most likely slip up a few, OK more than a few, times. I need to be kept accountable, and y'all have my permission to do so. I no longer want to say, post, or even think anything that is negative or discouraging. I have been blessed with a beautiful life! It's time that statement stays in the front of my mind and is reflected in everything I say and do.
Until next time,
Ammer Hammer
Life along the way
In the middle of the crazy
God Your love is so amazing
Through the ups and downs
You're the only hope I found, oh
Lord You meet me in the madness
So I'll learn to love these days
I'll learn to love these days"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tezG4LRNzw <- watch="">
"It takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile" We've all heard it at least once in our lives, but it got me thinking. If it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile, I bet it takes a heck of a lot more energy and breath to complain and be negative than it does to be encouraging and positive. I was talking to a close friend of mine the other day. I know she is the closest friend I have because she told me that some of my posts on my Facebook were whiny and dramatic. (Who really has the guts to say that but a close friend??) Well, she was absolutely right! I have no problem admitting that it is true. It was her statement that sparked the idea for this blog. It was also her comment and the above song that stirred the Holy Spirit's conviction.
The Bible warns several times about the sin of complaining:
Philippians 2:14, "Do all things without murmurings and disputings."
Ephesians 4:29, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."
Numbers 11:1, "And [when] the people complained, it displeased the LORD: and the LORD heard [it]; and his anger was kindled;"
And honestly, how many of us have gotten so put out with the Israelites while reading Exodus?? They grumbled so much, it is annoying!..... but then how annoying is it for other people to hear us complain, when the reality of the situation is we have AC and chocolate!! More importantly, how displeasing and annoying is it to the Lord who chooses to wake us up every morning? How angry does it make Him when He has blessed us more than we could have ever thought possible, but we only choose to acknowledge the negative or pain in our lives??
I opened this blog with the chorus from the song, "These Days" by Mandisa. (Definitely check this girl out!!) If you watched the video (you should have!! If not, go. NOW!) the first verse talks about everyday things that have a tendency to put us in a bad mood (not being able to find our phone, traffic, sit ups etc.); but then she says, "Funny what you use to help me grow." When I first heard that line, I stopped. Never in my life had I considered those things to be sent from God to be growing experiences, but that is exactly what they are!
In closing, a song combined with the blunt honesty from a friend were things I needed. I think y'all have figured out by now that not complaining is definitely something I intend to work on!! I didn't write this to guilt trip people (but if you do feel guilty, that would be the Holy Spirit's doing). I wrote this because I know I am not perfect, and I will most likely slip up a few, OK more than a few, times. I need to be kept accountable, and y'all have my permission to do so. I no longer want to say, post, or even think anything that is negative or discouraging. I have been blessed with a beautiful life! It's time that statement stays in the front of my mind and is reflected in everything I say and do.
Until next time,
Ammer Hammer
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